Friday, October 31, 2008

Halloween Confessions

So, there comes a point on Halloween when you just have to say to yourself, "Okay, I'll save the rest of the candy for the trick-or-treaters."

"Well, one more is not going to make much difference."

[Fishing through the bowl for another Twix.]

"Kids don't really appreciate chocolate anyway."

"Are you telling me some kid isn't going to have enough candy if I don't have any Twix left in this bowl when he gets here?"

[Rifling through the bowl a few minutes later.]

"Hey, did I see some Peanut M&M's left in there?"

"Well, the candy really goes on sale the day of Halloween, so if I have to go grab a couple more bags from the store, I'm really saving money."

[Surreptitiously stashing some wrappers at the bottom of the garbage can.]

"Weird. I could have sworn there were more Milky Way bars in this bowl. Huh."

[Casually] "Uh, what time do those trick-or-treaters start coming around?"

And finally, the annual promise to self: "Seriously, next year I am NOT opening any bags of candy until right before the trick-or-treating starts! I mean it this time."

Saturday, October 11, 2008

FFA: First Car

So, my computer died last week, and it has literally been the longest week of my life not having access to a computer. Ellis brings his laptop home at night, but because he often doesn't get home until really late, that hasn't given me a lot of time on it. I am counting down the days until the new guy (and by "guy" I mean computer . . . not mail-order husband) comes in the mail next week. Thus, my FFA this week is a day late.

This week's Friday Free-for-All topic is . . . . First Car

Well, I wasn't sure whether the offical title of "First Car" applied to the first car I drove, or the first car I actually bought myself. I opted for the first one since it is forever burned in my memory. The only problem is that I really couldn't find a picture to do justice to the truck I drove after I first got my license.

When I turned sixteen, my parents graciously let me drive this old Chevy pickup truck that they had recently acquired from a late great-uncle. It was a '66 or '67 (I can't remember which. . . not being the autmobile guru then that I'm really not today). When we first got it, the truck was bright orange. And when I say bright, I mean burn your retinas bright orange. So my parents thought it would be a good idea to paint it.

Opting not to completely take away from its natural beauty, the only thing that was changed was a large white stripe that was painted down the sides of the truck. My parents just weren't sure that anything else would complement the green leather seats so well. I mean, really, can you blame them?

Now lest you think this vehicle was merely eye candy, let me describe for you some of its more endearing qualities. The steering wheel was about twice as big as me and had no power-steering. Trying to turn the brute helped me to acquire the bulging biceps so popular in high school girls. And it did indeed have an AM radio, so I could keep up on my talk radio and hillbilly stations. Not only that, but it usually only took one of my paychecks from Barry's Parkview Drive-In (the local fast-food joint) to fill up the gas tank.

But the best part about driving this truck was that it jingled. That's right, jingled. I was often mistaken for Santa by children from afar. I got a lot of old cookies thrown at me by pissed off kids when I drove by. Yeah, sure, it was festive during the holidays, but it just wasn't practical for everyday driving.

Yes, folks, overall it was the dream first car of any 16-year-old girl.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

Why Day Time Television is Here to Stay

I randomly found this clip and watched it about 3 times, and every time it made me laugh harder. I'm not sure why.

All I have to say is . . . The mustache, really? Because the hair is making your life easier?

Friday, October 3, 2008

FFA: Saturday Morning Cartoons

Friday Free for All Topic of the Week: Saturday Morning Cartoons

My memories of the joy that was Saturday morning cartoons illustrate the true difference between kids and adults. When I was a kid, not only did I not sleep in on Saturdays, but I would get up even earlier than a weekday just so that I could camp out in front of the TV for a couple of unhindered hours before my mom made us do our chores.

I always associate watching Saturday morning cartoons with my brother Cody (who is only a year younger than I am). We were the only ones who actually chose to get up at an obscene hour like 6:00 in the morning on Saturdays. Okay, I take that back. My dad did, too, but it was to go play basketball, and he's kind of crazy, so that really doesn’t count. My older sisters were teenagers (the lure of the Saturday morning cartoon had lost its magic) and had come to appreciate the value of sleep, and our youngest brother TJ was too little during the golden age of the Saturday morning cartoons.

And seriously, you can’t tell me that cartoons were better back then. They weren’t. They were just as crappy as they are now, and we totally didn’t care. I mean, I hate those Tom and Jerry cartoons or the Roadrunner now because they are so violent, and that really bugs me. Seriously, I wouldn’t let my kids watch them. But I didn’t seem to have a problem with them back then.

Here’s a list of other crappy cartoons that my brother and I loved to watch:

  • He-Man (and the Masters of the Universe!)
  • She -Ra (or was she just a character in He-Man? I forget.)
  • Jem and the Holograms
  • Thunder Cats (seriously, what kind of creepy show was that? Yeah, it was a favorite.)
  • Smurfs
  • Transformers
  • The Bugs Bunny and Friends
  • G.I. Joe

Now my feelings on Saturday morning cartoons have changed, but they are no less appreciated. Ellis and I discovered when our oldest daughter was about 3, that we could train her to head down to the family room when she woke up on Saturdays rather than wake up her tired parents who just wanted to sleep in that ONE day (is that asking too much?) We’d make sure the TV channel was set on PBS and showed her how to turn it on when she got up in the morning. Then we’d get up an hour later or so, and you know, give her some food or something. It was a win-win situation.

Life really hasn’t been as good since we stopped getting cable . . .