FFA Topic of the Week: What do you, or would you, hide from your kids?
My addictions. And like any good addict, I hide them well. During the day, I limit how much TV my children watch, how much sugary stuff they eat, and [attempt to] force them to eat their vegetables. I’m strict about bedtime (although, let’s face it – this is probably more about my need for sanity at the end of the day than about them getting their beauty sleep.)
After the kids are in bed, though, I lead a double life. Think Angelina Jolie’s character in Mr. and Mrs. Smith, only instead of assassinating people for a living and wearing lingerie under a trench coat, my secret identity involves eating large quantities of ice cream and staying up late watching crap on TV while wearing old sweats.
So, yeah, I’m a hypocrite. I admit it. Ellis and I have often bemoaned the fact that one day our kids won’t be going to bed at 8:30, and then how are we going to hide the batch of no-bake cookies that we eat all in one sitting? Or the fact that we’ll stay up until 2:00 in the morning watching episodes of 24 or Arrested Development?
The other tricky part is that as the kids get older, it’s getting harder to hide my stash. I think they’re on to me. I’m having to get more creative with my hiding spots. Look, it’s for their own good. I know that it’s not good to eat a bunch of cookies or candy bars (hey, they were 4 for $1 at Maverick, okay?) every day. I hide the cookies so that they can maintain their health, and so their teeth won’t rot out of their heads. Yeah, I love them that much. One day they’ll thank me. (Or maybe not, if I find a good enough hiding place . . . )
After the kids are in bed, though, I lead a double life. Think Angelina Jolie’s character in Mr. and Mrs. Smith, only instead of assassinating people for a living and wearing lingerie under a trench coat, my secret identity involves eating large quantities of ice cream and staying up late watching crap on TV while wearing old sweats.
So, yeah, I’m a hypocrite. I admit it. Ellis and I have often bemoaned the fact that one day our kids won’t be going to bed at 8:30, and then how are we going to hide the batch of no-bake cookies that we eat all in one sitting? Or the fact that we’ll stay up until 2:00 in the morning watching episodes of 24 or Arrested Development?
The other tricky part is that as the kids get older, it’s getting harder to hide my stash. I think they’re on to me. I’m having to get more creative with my hiding spots. Look, it’s for their own good. I know that it’s not good to eat a bunch of cookies or candy bars (hey, they were 4 for $1 at Maverick, okay?) every day. I hide the cookies so that they can maintain their health, and so their teeth won’t rot out of their heads. Yeah, I love them that much. One day they’ll thank me. (Or maybe not, if I find a good enough hiding place . . . )
3 comments:
Alright, alright...I forgive you for getting the small Coldstone...you had to save up room for all the stuff you had at home.
We're friends again.
Can I just copy your post and use it as mine, because it fit me perfectly? Occasionally Kimball will see me drinking a Dr. Pepper and say "Mom, that is not healthy for your body." Blah, blah, blah! I know, but I'm already addicted, which is why I'm trying to save my children from the same hidden life I lead.
Would it be okay for me to delete my post, copy your's and paste it on my blog? We are the same person. Of course this is a direct result of being pre-existent pals, but crap! You're so much more succinct than I!
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